Seeing Like a Rat, starring Nightshade City by Hilary Wagner

I gave Nightshade City by Hilary Wagner to my now-ten-year-old for his birthday, but of course I had to preview it first. He said "I love it. this is, like, the best book ever!" I say Hilary has created engaging, distinct, and memorable characters, but more impressive is her abiltity to turn readers into rats.

Really, she did. I was a rat for several hours. She describes the beautiful Clover in such a way that I believe that Clover's not just a rodent, she's a female to envy and admire. Hilary somehow skipped over all the little nudges that often occur, where the author has to keep reminding the reader that the animals are animals, not people in fur with whiskers and tails glued on.

She was quite lovely, with smooth cocoa skin, and light fur, buff in color and downy soft, much more suited for a snow hair than for a rat. She had a short, rounded nose and a sculpted refined muzzle. Eyes the color of citrine offered up varied hues of yellowy briliance, round and open. Despite her beauty, she had an approachable sweetness, modest and shy.

Shall I give you Killdeer, snarly High Minister?

Lazily picking a scrap of roast hen off his distended stomach, Killdeer idly flicked the oily meat across his den. The mammoth rat slumped down further in his silver-chalice throne, only his limbs, potbelly, and snoutvisible to an onlooker...His legs draped over his silver throne like mounds of heavy velvet, leaving his immense feet hanging over the side like two dead gray rabbits. 

The dead rabbits line really jumped out at me, in a good way. He's like a furry Henry the Eighth.

Nightshade City follows two orphaned brothers, Vincent and Victor, who escape from the Catacombs and forced service in the Kill Army. They stumble into the rebel stronghold and find a group ready to fight for the freedom their father died trying to restore.

Another orphan, Clover, has caught Killdeer's eye and has no chance of escape with the Kill Army guarding her. Their paths will cross as the rebels seek to pull down the power-hungry Killdeer and his creepy second-in-command, Billycan. Nightshade City, once just a dream of the earlier generation, waits to be born.

This was a great book, well worth the purchase. Isaac was rereading some of his favorite parts at breakfast this morning and almost made us late to school. However, parents may want to preview this book. I don't suggest it to younger elementary, as Billycan and the Kill Army are quite vicious, pulling out tongues for torture, and there are some mentions of females being chosen to mate with Killdeer. Not graphic, but you might check it out first. I really liked the overall message of the book, actually.

Hilary is one of the friendliest writers I've met, so you might want to stop by and say hello to her. Because let me tell you, it was cool to tell Isaac "I know the author of this book." He was impressed ;)

Has anyone else been turned into a rat? What got you?
Glutton for Punishment?

Boost

I went to book club recently, and I told myself in the car not to bring up writing or my book. But I made a comment about the ancient Egyptian worldview, which I've been learning about for Book the Second, which led my friend to bring bringing up my new book.

This dear friend RAVED again about my writing and my ideas and how so very clever and imaginative I am, and on and on. I blushed and got through my elevator pitches.

                                   It was just like this.

I don't want to be like one of those people that are always asking people for praise or constant affirmation. Most of the time I can just keep plugging away, nobody knows what I'm working on. I mean, how many times can someone ask "How's the book coming?" and you answere, "Oh, I'm just trying to tighten things up, still editing," before it gets boring?

But man, it feels so good to have someone get excited about my book. It feels so good after rejections and the ever-present fears of what may never be. I've missed a lot of baby showers and Pampered Chef parties to write this thing, but to this friend, it was worth it. It spoke to her.

This friend is a naturally exuberant person, and I feel narcissistic when I'm around her. But it feels good. Yay for positive people.

I can do better than that. A-hem.

YAY for POSITIVE PEOPLE!

Who are your cheerleaders and how have they helped you? Can you tell them I want to be friends, too?
Glutton for Punishment?

Girl Parts

What is it about girls and cyborgery? I've picked up several of these books recently, the latest being "Girl Parts" by John M. Cusick, but I've also read the "Specials" by Scott Westerfeld, "The Adoration of Jenna Fox" by Mary Pearson and "Skinned" by Robin Wasserman. Apparently in this age of texting and Facebook and smart phones, there're a lot of questions about how this affects us as human beings. In typical science fiction watchtower syndrome, there are warnings about the dangers of the ultra-linked world that has already arrived in some ways. Lots of folks have reviewed the latter three, so here's my review of "Girl Parts."

Gorgeous cover, right?

"Girl Parts" is about a Companion bot named Rose, who is designed to help David Sun overcome dissociative disorder, kind of like how teens have might to carry around a fake baby for health class. But Rose is an AI girlfriend, programmed to require certain kinds of interactions before she'll allow physical contact. And it seems to be working. David spends less time with his video games, and is eager to meet Rose's requirements so that things can progress to sex. Unfortunately...well, it is a YA book. When Rose's program to please David can't be completed, she has to find her own reason for existing.

The most interesting thing about this book was what it says about real relationships, and how sometimes people can get into patterns of thinking that are very robotic. Boy spends time with girl, thus girl is obligated to do XYZ. Rose's thoughts in some places were very poignant to me, but I don't want to spoil it for you. So, I'll just say that this book was worth reading, especially if you enjoyed any of the other books above.

If you're looking for a book for your teenager, I would highly recommend you preview it first. David is very concerned with losing his virginity, and while I imagine that his motivations are fairly realistic, it's a bit detailed for my taste in some places. But, I think the consequences of his actions are worthy of a good discussion. His choices are not glamorized, and the overall message is a good one.

Girl Parts came out in Aug. of this year, and I received this ARC (better late than never!) on loan from Around The World Blogs, which you can find in my side bar. Thanks!
Glutton for Punishment?

Plumping Up Dialogue

In celebration of multiple signs from the universe that I need to tighten up my pacing and set some better hooks at end of my chapters, I'm studying. Today I'm sharing what I've gathered about convincing dialogue.

My favorite dialogue movies are very revealing about what I value: wit. "Oh Brother, Where Art Thou?," and "Clue," "Real Genius," and "Napoleon Dynamite". TV shows would be "Seinfeld", of course, "The Simpsons", "Burn Notice," and "Castle."

It's a wonder my characters ever have anything serious to say.

As with all writing, the first rule is to revise. As far as I know all good dialogue must be revised no less than twenty times. Maybe that number varies, but good dialogue doesn't just happen. It takes a lot of work.

Here're my current dialogue guidelines. Please add anything in the comments that has helped you.

1. Don't have the characters say anything they both know. "Look, he's dead." That kind of thing. Never say "As you know, Jim, my pet zebra escaped last week..." Have you tried to use this in real conversation? People get annoyed really fast. It's kind of fun.
2. Don't go on and on. Or even just on. It might be one of your character's quirks to be longwinded, but be aware that the reader will likely skim! "But Tom Clancy still got published!" you protest. I know. He did, so did Ayn Rand and tons of other writers. I skim those books. A lot.
3. Use dialogue to reveal character. Sure, sometimes dialogue will be necessary to move the plot, but that's not its main purpose. Dialogue is for the reader to get to know the characters. The beats and action are to move the plot.
4. Have characters at odds with each other as much as possible. Not necessarily fighting, but they can't want exactly the same thing. Otherwise, what are they talking for? They could be doing whatever it is that they are in perfect agreement upon. Thus...
5. A major purpose of communication is to persuade people to do what we want. 
6. Other purposes of communication are information sharing. I'd suggest keeping this type of dialogue to a minimum in a novel. It's great for real life, though.
7. Another purpose is establishing levels of intimacy. Word choice and levels of playfulness are mutaully agreed upon in the art of conversation, and that can be fun to read, especially when the characters are uncertain about the other person's goals or they have conflicting expectations. Think every romance novel ever written. It doesn't have to be romantic intimacy, though. All relationships have a level of intimacy.
8. Listen, listen, listen, but don't write the way people talk. You want to distill normal conversation into a more compact, clever, and conflicted version of real life. I might talk to a friend for an hour in real life, but if it takes more than fifteen seconds to read that dialogue, we'd better have saved the planet! 
9. Never have your character trying to accomplish the exact same thing with a second line. Have their goals change with the conversation, in reaction to the other person's responses. People usually escalate when they're blocked. Or they try another angle. Or they...you get it. Don't let them bore the reader. The reader wants to see what they'll try next, not what they just tried. "Story" by Robert McKee has a great chapter on this. It's a screenwriting book, but well worth reading.

That's what I've got. I'm also reviewing my copy of "Longman's Guide to Intermediate and Advanced Fiction Writing", and it's very good, also. (Both of these books I previewed at the library before buying, so I don't recommend them lightly.)

What dialogue moves you? Where do you go when you want to be amazed by dialogue? Books can have some good dialogue, too! lol "The Queen's Thief" series by Megan Whalen Turner has very clever dialogue. And Kathryn Magendie has great regional dialogue, especially if you want to look at a Southern twist. She goes way beyond throwing a ya'll in. Her blog is lots of fun, so check her out. When I first met her online, I commented on how much I enjoyed her dialogue, and she said that it had not been easy and seemed delighted. So, there's hope for all of us. Work hard, revise and rerevise, and you can have sharp, believeable dialogue that brings your characters to life.

I hope you enjoy the links; I'm trying to be less lazy in my blogging.
Finally, here's one of my favorite moments from Clue. Enjoy!



I have to go back to making Play-Doh snakes and eating salty blue spaghetti with the kiddoes now. Happy Writing!
Glutton for Punishment?

Bruiser by Neal Shusterman

Tennyson is very concerned when his sister, Bronte, starts a new project, in the form of social rehab of a loner, Bruiser, who looks like he's descended from the Hulk. Tennyson feels their home life is already complicated enough with their parents separating. But Tennyson gets to know Bruiser and realizes that he's an okay guy, if a little wierd. He and Bronte figure out that Bruiser has a secret as terrible in practice as it is wonderful in the abstract. They try to help him, but sometimes the person in the mirror needs help the most.

"Bruiser" is told from four persectives, and I was impressed with how convincing each of the voices were. I loved the Special Thing Bruiser could do, which I won't describe here. It was cool and very believable, though.

I also loved the theme of how pain is a necessary part of life, and it reminded me a bit of "The Giver" in that way. I'll just say that Bruiser changes a lot of things for the people he cares about, and sometimes protecting someone isn't in their best interests.

Thanks to Around the World Blogs for lending me this ARC. The book was released in June, and the paperback will come out in April. Definately worth reading and nothing was out of place. I highly recommend.
Glutton for Punishment?

Don't Wring Your Hands!!!

What to do when you are rejected:

1. Refresh your email to make sure it wasn't a mistake.
2. Find something to get angry about. You know it's in there. "This is a form rejection!!! I bet they didn't even read it!!!" OR "This criticism is too vague to even help me!!!"  OR "This criticism is specific, but it could apply to chapter one or chapter twenty-one!!!" Regardless of how your anger expresses itself, remember to use exclamation marks. Lots of them. We all know there's no better revenge against an agent than multiple exclamation points. Oh, yes. We have our weapons, too.
3. Read the rejection again. If it's an email, print it just so you can have the satisfaction of balling it up and throwing it in the trash, or setting it on fire, if you run like that.
4. Cry a lot, and make sure to tell people how devastated you are, and how cruel the publishing industry is. Facebook is very helpful in this regard. Don't worry about being an emo. Your true friends will want to know what you're going through.
5. Shoot an email to your crit partner crying about number two above. Delete them from your address book if they reply and tell you someone else will be interested. After all, this is their fault for not telling you what you needed to fix in the first place!
6. Get a milkshake. That's the drink I'd feel most guilty about drinking that I'd actually drink, but I'm sure you will adjust the beverage to fit your own personal demons. Get fat/drunk/stoned. That will show them!!!
7. Make sure not to write anything constructive for a few days. Mull over the rejection for many hours. Accept that you suck and you'll never be published. And everybody who ever said they loved your story has bad taste in literature and is a pathological liar. They're all out to get you.
8. OR Make the suggested changes, if the agent was jerky enough to provide any feedback. Stay up all night if that's what it takes. Email the agent back and ask them to look at your revisions. They'll be impressed with your passion, I promise. You might be willing to forgive the agent if they see the error of their ways.
9. If some idiot tells you that you're not being very professional, remind them that you would like to be a professional, but you keep getting rejected! What kind of a trap is that? This is a good spot to use any short words based in Anglo-Saxon. 

Yes, I got a rejection. It was actually extremely helpful, and I still cried. A lot. I emailed a crit partner. I was frustrated. And then I got on with my life. If you're querying, you can't afford to lose a whole day of writing every time someone doesn't like your book. Because how will you be able to write EVER when you finally are published? Have you read any reviews on Amazon lately? Even books I love have pros and cons.

Seriously. Pick the last book that you really liked and go read the reviews. Unless you read Narnia, I guarantee you someone hated it. I was shocked that not everyone loved The Queen of Attolia. There are 58 reviews of The Queen of Attolia, and 6 are very negative. What are these people thinking? That's one of the best books I've ever read! Read the bad reviews. Laugh about how they didn't get it and remember again that there's a lot of subjectiveness in this business.

I am taking querying very slowly, and I think this has been a good thing for me. "Pulse" is my first book, and I've been fortunate enough to receive feedback from some of the agents I've contacted. The criticisms I got yesterday were very hard to hear, but now that I've gone through my stages of grief, I can see that she was right. It's very good that I didn't send out queries to all the agents on my list at once, because I still have lots of options, and that feels great. I plan on taking a few weeks to think about the criticism recieved, then fix it. I'll work on another project in the meantime.

So, when you get a rejection, keep breathing. Cry. Get it out, and get on with your life. I find doing something non writing related for a while helps, like playing piano or taking the kids to the park, or cleaning the disaster that was my kitchen.

Something to think about, though: If you query ten agents a month and lose a day with every rejection, you've cut down your writing time by a third. That would really be a shame, wouldn't it? Good luck, friends.
Glutton for Punishment?

Crescendo by Becca Fitzpatrick

Spoilers for "Hush Hush" ahead. You're warned.

I like the cover.

In "Hush, Hush", Nora Grey fell for the ultimate bad boy, fallen angel Patch. He lied to her, placed her in dangerous situations, and was actually plotting her death for the entire book. Nora knows she should probably stay away from him, but just can't say no and mean it.

"Crescendo" builds on this. I had forgotten how Nora operates, so I spent the whole first half of the book like a kid watching a horror movie: "No, don't investigate the mysterious thumping in the basement in the middle of the night with a half-dead flashlight during a rainstorm. Don't do it!"

I like my characters to be smart, to have some self-preservation instincts. Nora does not have this. Some people don't even notice, they love her for being so trusting and/or foolish. In "Hush, Hush", perhaps they trusted the writer that Patch would end up being worth it, but all I could think is, "Why would you go out again with someone who treats you that way?" There's more of that in Crescendo, too, although the book follows the required mid-series breakup formula.

I will say that Nora was a lot more proactive, if misguided, in this book, and the funny best friend was, well, funny. Patch's character was much more likeable and I found myself rooting for him. There were some scenes that were very fun to read.

I don't have to fall in love with a main character, but I couldn't lose myself in Nora at all. This may say more about me than about the book. I am not a let's-hope-this-doesn't-kill-me kind of girl. She was really emotional and insecure, and that was hard for me to read, too, but it wasn't beyond my experiences as a teen. I saw people act in ways that were at least this dumb.

I wish that Fitzpatrick had reminded us of how the whole Nephilim/fallen angel thing worked earlier in the story and how the first book had ended, because it took a while for that info to be restated, and I'd forgotten most of it.

The second half of the book really picked up and I read it much faster. I don't know if I will read the next book in the series, but maybe. I like tension in a relationship to be based on misunderstandings, not demeaning actions, and in that way, Nora's relationship with Patch was much more plausible to me in Crescendo. But with other characters, Nora is a total pushover. I'd like to tell Nora that she doesn't have to let guys treat her like she's a piece of trash, and I'd like to have a good, long talk with her mother for encouraging Nora to spend time with a psycho childhood friend. Neither Nora nor her mom have a backbone. Sigh.

TONS of people loved "Hush, Hush," and they will love "Crescendo," too. I was engaged with the story, but in a frustrated, "Wake up, girl!" kindof way.

Thanks to Around the World Tours for sending me this ARC. Anybody who reviews YA books on their blog can sign up, so check it out. They are also looking for YA ARC donations. Happy reading!
Glutton for Punishment?