Advice to an aspiring novelist

Hello world! I have a friend that has just started a novel. She asked for some writing tips and is a little reluctant to join an online writer's workshop because of possible idea theft. (Links to the the best writing tips are at the bottom!) This is my response:

I was concerned about letting people know what my story is about at first, too. But now that I'm talking to writers and understanding how much work it is to get something publish-worthy, I think the feedback I get from OWW far outweighs any risk. Everybody on their has their own "baby" that they're nurturing, and it's just too much work to take someone else's incomplete idea. Anyway, you only post up to three chapters at a time, and someone would have to stalk you for months to get the full story, and you don't have to post the polished version if you don't want to.

In addition, your computer files have save dates on them, and if someone uses large chunks of your work- not just the general ideas, because that's very very hard to prove and also extremely unlikely- you're protected that way.

Unless you're writing term papers, the risk of plagiarism is very unlikely. More likely is what happened to Stephenie Meyer- She sent out a few copies of a draft and that friend gave it to her friend, which gave it to her friend, etc.

(This happened after she was on the NYT bestseller's list. Most writers have to struggle to find someone who loves them enough to struggle through the early versions, myself included.)

So unless you don't want to risk *anyone* reading it, I wouldn't worry about posting it piece by piece online. Of course, this is my advice and you have to make the decision about what you feel comfortable with. But even after starting as a good writer, studying and writing constantly for a year, I find the impartial advice of people that aren't afraid to hurt my feelings (and to tell me what works) is the best best thing I have done to improve. Way cheaper than conferences, too.

The great thing about being in a workshop is you can also read other people's reviews of other writers' submission. This helped me to understand the vocabulary, to have the words when something wasn't "right", and to glimpse what experienced writers see when they read. It's a whole new process.

If you don't find things that bother you or you wish that they'd handled a little differently in MOST of the novels you read, then you either pick the greatest books ever penned or you need to develop your inner critic.

Again, this is meant as friendly advice based on my experience. Read, study, write. Make sure you understand passive voice and can spot it (and slay it like a dragon).
Find out what an info dump is and make a solemn vow not to do so. Don't overuse
"that, just, really, kindof, sortof" or other words that aren't necessary. Avoid adverbs unless you really really need one. No more than one exclamation point every ten pages, and the same for metaphors. Get a book on grammar if you don't have one already.

Be aware that when you send in a MS, you will have to change italics to underline, because the agents have weak eyes, poor things! And you will have to have your MS double spaced, one inch margins, with name/TITLE/page # in the upper right hand corner. Start each new chapter half-way down the page. 12 pt Times New Roman or Courier are the preferred fonts.

There's also the option, if you're really concerned about theft, to write short stories and post those to develop your skill as a writer but keep your novel at home.

The thing about early drafts is that they're early drafts. I can't say if your idea will fly because I truly believe in the hands of a persistant writer any story can be worth reading.

I write (roughly) for plot and character the first draft, consistency and flow the second draft. Deep characterization and believability in the third draft (where I'm at right now). It takes a lot of work to get it pretty, correct, charming, balanced, smooth, flowing, engaging, generous, surprising, and lively. I read an author's blog who posted all twelve of his versions for his chapter one. I read 1,2,3,4,5,8,and 12...and wow. He was a hack in the first draft, but by the end...it was good writing.

(And the book is getting published. I've searched for his blog but it's lost. Should have bookmarked it- Drat!)

My kids' guidance counselor has a quote on her bulletin board that I smile at everyday when I walk Eli to his door. "The great thing about being a writer is that you don't have to get it right the first time, unlike, say, a brain surgeon. -David ???" I'll update tomorrow morning after I get his full name:)

Okay- that's all I 've got! Good luck, and send me your Ch 1. and a plot summary if you're still game:)

I would add, read up on writer's and agent's websites. A good place to start is my friend Teresa Frohock's Very Thorough Post of links to writerly tips. Nathan Bransford, super agent, put it all together in one place for you, too.
And, for anyone interested, I love Online Writer's Workshop for Science Fiction and Fantasy. Happy writing!

Is there another word for synonym?

Glutton for Punishment?

Original, fresh...or not.

Back to plagiarism.
We went to the library today and checked out way too many books (25 total- seven for me, the rest for the kids, and hey- there's four of them.)

But how does this relate to stealing people's ideas and passing them off as your own? Simply. The children's area is right next to magazines and I picked up a copy of Reader's Digest. Guess what they call a section on writerly tips? INK WELL. Hey! That's my idea! I googled Ink Well when I picked it, and didn't get anything 'big' from that search, but apparently I missed this one. OR they stole my idea!

Either way, it is a big compliment, right? Because it says that professional writer magazine people picked the same double-meaning title for their regular column. Writer magazine writer must be doubly discerning, right?

I'm thinking of new titles for my blog- Ink Good (Well and Good are interchangeable, right?) Ma Gellin' (okay, no European explorer puns, but I'm struggling.)
Any ideas?
Glutton for Punishment?

Dan Brown Versus William Dietrich

What am I listening to on the ipod? Nothing.

Where am I supposed to be? In church, but I've two sickly children who are sleeping. Which means that I tried to fix my collapsing posts, but still can't find a way to get rid of the "click here" on posts that are not collapsed. So, Nathan will be home in an hour and wonder why I didn't do anything to tidy up, but the blog is important, people!

What am I reading? The Rosetta Key, by William Dietrich. About a hundred pages in.

Here's Chapter One

Rosetta Key follows Ethan cage though Jerusalem in the months before Napoleon is due to bring his conquest of the world to the Holy City. Cage is searching for a possible artifact of great power- power that pharaohs, Moses, and even Mohammed might have used to establish their nations.

Here's an analogy. Angels and Demons is to The Rosetta Key as National Treasure is to Indiana Jones.

Some, like my good friend the Book Dragon, have issues with Dan Brown, who many of you will know has a third book coming out. (On the other side, my mother-in-law has her copy reserved.)

I feel a bit sorry for him. No, really. Because how many symbols can you pack into a book before it all runs together? Readers pigeonholed him from the start, and good luck to him if he wants to write anything else.

And all of the fame, the over-crowded book signings, the bushels of letters and emails. How tedious. What a curse.

And, as Tevya says in Fiddler on the Roof, "May the Lord smite me with it."

Two snowmen are standing in a field. One says to the other : "Funny, I smell carrots too".

Glutton for Punishment?

I’m waiting for my check

Let's try something. I'll describe a story, and you tell me if you can craft a best seller.

There's this ring, and it's really powerful. So powerful that it can make you invisible and take over your mind if you're not careful. So this hobbit—hobbits are like a short people with hairy feet—gets the ring from his uncle.

Then a wizard tells him they are in danger and Middle Earth will be destroyed if Sauron, the evil lord of Mordor gets the ring back. The hobbit is kind of weak, so he has some friends to help him on his quest. There's the true king, an elf, a dwarf, maybe a few more hobbits…I think I'm going to have a tree guardian…maybe I'll call it a tree herder.

Anyway, Freddie (I may change that. Freddie seems a little too 'Hardy Boys', if you know what I mean.) and Steve (may change that, too) go on this long journey, and finally get to a giant crater in the earth, left by a meteor. (The ring is made from meteor-ore and meteors are the only magic strong enough to destroy the ring.) Freddie struggles, but is finally able to overcome his desire to keep the ring and they destroy Sauron and the new king is crowned.

It's a great idea, right? It could become the next big thing- the basis for a whole new genre...

But could you develop the idea as beautifully as Tolkien did?

I've described my idea to lots of people, and since I've spent some time working on my query letters, I can give a decent synopsis. But I still have this niggle in my brain that makes me want to say, "It's better on paper."

Try describing a #1 song to someone. Knock out the melody on the piano for them. They say, "Oh, that's neat that you write music. I'm kindof working on a song right now, too.

It's not enough to have an idea- you have to have a seasoned, sweated over manuscript. You must polish your story until it reflects the red veins in your bloodshot-computer-screen-weary-eyes.

When I first considered joining an online writer's group, some friends were concerned that my ideas would be stolen. That someone would make millions off my brilliantly amazing ideas, if I may be so modest.

But all the plagiarism I've heard about is pretty doubtful. I've read one comment on a blog where a lady that sniffed that she'd finished her novel about a boy in wizard school a month before the first Harry Potter came out. And Stephenie Meyer was sued over some resemblances, but I wonder that the attorney would even bother. (Nevermind that last comment. Of course they would bother.)

It's all about the execution. And execution is hard. Just as hard as bringing the characters to life. (get it?)

But some people are confused about how much work it is to write it, and write it well. So I'm going to copyright some ideas, and whenever anyone uses my little gems, they have to go through me. Coming up with the ideas is the fun part, anyway. Actually writing it…ughh.

1. Magic. This is my idea, and if you want to use it, you'd better take out your pocket book.

2. Vampires. Duh.

3. Thwarted love. I believe in reincarnation as of this minute, and I invented this storyline in a previous life.

4.Fear of your dead spouse not really being dead and you move on and then it turns out they've been trapped on an island for years, dreaming of you. (Tom Hanks, I'm waiting for you to return my calls. Though, to be honest, this one's my husband Nathan's brainchild)

5. I may add some more. I come up with stuff all of the time. Check back later.

I should be rolling in the dough in no time. And it's virtually pain-free!

What am I missing? Did you ever have an idea and somebody beat you to it?

Glutton for Punishment?

What better way to test a collapsing post than with a joke?

Here's an old family classic. Where does a king keep his armies?
Up his SLEEVIES! Thanks for keeping it alive, Cleo.

I don't like how the button appears at the end of every post. If anyone can help me fix that, I'd love to know how. As it is, I'm going to start closing with a joke. Making lemons out of lemonade, right?
Hang on a second...
Glutton for Punishment?

I forgot to bring fresh batteries, and that’s okay.

Concerning our camping trip to Mount Pigah, NC, blueberries, unbending rangers, and why writing can be superior to photography.

We went up to Mt Pisgah campground last Friday with fear and trembling. The weather did not look great, but Dad and my little sister had driven up from Florida and I'd already paid for the sites. "Not look great" in this case means clouds with little lightning icons on the hour-by-hour weather report until 9am on Saturday.

I called to see if we could switch nights, but no luck. The reservation system has been centralized, which means that the rules are the same for every person across this country, which is great, but they do not allow employees to touch scissors, because they might accidently cut the red tape. As a bonus, because we were inside the four day window from the date we wanted, they had no access to reservation information, so we couldn't even just skip Friday night and pay additional money for Saturday. Very cunning. (I'm excited about the whole health care shebang that's headed this way.)

We got there in time on Friday to put up Dad's monster tent (12'x20') by flashlight. There was lightning, but not too close. Clouds rested below us, then swept up the mountain as night fell. It was very exciting (and damp) for the kids to sleep in a cloud.

On Saturday, we saw the waterfalls and Sliding Rock (Emma went down four times, Isaac and Eli once, me twice, Nathan three times—it was extremely very very cold). Saturday night, which was supposed to be clear-ish, fell apart around seven. We'd finished our charred foil pack dinners and the kids and I were headed to listen to the rangers go on about birds when it start drizzling.

I wasn't sure if it was an open air or covered pavilion, and we all had on jackets, so we kept going. But the drizzle turned to tiny, unencapsulated water balloons, and I ran with the kids to a "comfort station", where everybody took some porcelain comfort and, in chatting with some ladies, I found out that the bird campfire program was cancelled. Hubby and Dad were supposed to catch up to us after getting dinner cleaned up, but I hadn't seen them, and decided to get the kids back to the tent. So we ran back—only no Dad and hubby waited for us. They had taken the car to find us and returned after 10 minutes.

Hanging out in a tent with hours to go before bedtime and four rowdy kids and a tween could have been a lot of fun, but we piled into the car and headed to the Mt. Pisgah Inn. I ordered the Big Fat Chocolate cake, and it was. Big. Fat. Chocolate. So rich, I shared more than the obligatory bite swap with hubby. Everyone at the table got a few bites. And the corn fritters and fried green tomatoes were also good.

Next day, we waited for the law enforcement ranger to come by and write us a ticket for not setting up on the tent pad, which we couldn't do since the tent was too large. (A regular ranger had given us a written warning, which we ignored, and a verbal reprimand which hubby good-naturedly rebuffed. "Sure, I'd like to talk to the law enforcement ranger. Noone told us that our tents had to be within a size…" blah blah blah. She was not used to people trying to have things make sense-the tent was still in the gravel area but she was arguing about environmental impact.)Really, we wolfed down our s'mores for breakfast and got out of there before the ranger could appear.

A fellow camper had tipped us that it was blueberry season, and we drove to mile marker 420, Black Balsam Peak, and walked from the trail head about a mile along an old logging road to a meadow full of blueberries and blackberries. And we didn't have a camera. Drat. Kindof.

I wanted to take pictures of the kids with blue smears across their faces and Jonas asking before each and every berry went in his mouth "dat good Daddy?" "Just the blue ones." The ferny moss that pads the marshy flow of water down the mountain slope. The way hikers and berry pickers seem all have dogs (except us), and Isaac asking every dog owner if their dog is friendly about a half-second before he starts petting them, just assuming they are. The treasure of finding a branch with seven or eight ripe berries clumped together so that you can just hold your bucket up and pull them from the stem and let them drop.

Eli asking me over and over if he's a good blueberry hunter and giving me high-fives. Isaac dumping his cup into my bucket, but making sure I notice how well he's done first, and calling me to come over and see what a great thicket he found. Emma with her little snort-laugh (it's cute, I promise) when Hubby asks her if she'll carry him back.

I don't need to cry over these pictures we never took because I'm writing it down now. And I'm writing down Jonas' secret code- "Do it again Daddy" means drive through a tunnel, and "Daddy, don't do dat" means don't drive off the mountain. How could a picture tell me that?

Glutton for Punishment?

The Price We Pay

This was written yesterday. Today is Friday. I'm almost certain.
Here’s my story with a sobering moral. It’s okay to laugh.Eli had a dentist appointment this morning (he had five cavities- Thank you unfluoridated water of Western PA) -at least I thought so until we were halfway across town- I literally take three interstates to get to our fantastic, cheap dentist. And then I couldn’t figure out if it was Wednesday or Thursday. Then I was sure it was Wednesday. Because we went to April’s house on Monday, or was that Tuesday? And Eli met a kindergarten teacher (not necessarily his), we went to the library…but which thing on what day?

The real problem is that yesterday I wrote all day and stayed up again until 3 AM.

I couldn’t figure it out, so I turned to the ultimate mental calendar- what did we eat? Rice and étouffée last night. And what did I scrape off of the plates the night before? Bean burritos? Yeah. That’s it. So it must be Wednesday.

I turned around and headed home. One exit later, I remembered asking Nathan if he was playing basketball tonight, and he said yeah- so it must be Thursday. Really? Maybe.

I didn’t have my cell, so I turned around again and headed back towards the dentist. Once I was off the interstate, I stopped at a gas station and took a peek at a newspaper. Today was Thursday. ALL DAY, if you can imagine. We got to the dentist two minutes late, but they weren’t ready for us, so all’s well.

Which brings me to...What have I given up for my writing?

A clean house? No. I was never fastidious.

Time with my kids? Somewhat. But I almost always make sure we have a family activity like the library or swimming . The pictures are proof that we spend time together:)

Working out? Well, that comes and goes anyway, but I’m there 4-5 days a week right now, so I’ll say no.
TV? Yep. Evening is prime writing time.

Sleep? Yes, but I can only go so long.

None of that really feels like a sacrifice.

The real sacrifice has been getting a knock on the door and wondering who could it be, and it’s ladies from church arriving right when I said they should.

Or late Tuesday night remembering that today was Boy Scouts, and Isaac missed again. Or “Oh yeah, we’re out of toilet paper”.

In its defense, my brain is really busy right now.

I’m on the elliptical machine, wondering what my character, David, will say to his dad when he finds out about his mom. I’m sautéing onions, and Lara is inside me, trying to forgive David for tricking her. I’m lying in bed, trying to burn an important plot point into my memory because I don’t want to get up and write it down, but I get up and write it down anyway, because I can’t sleep otherwise.

I hope that readers will believe my characters are real. Because otherwise, I’m just ditzy. And if they're not real, then how can they be causing so many problems?

PS, I go on awesome dates with my husband, too.

Glutton for Punishment?